Guaranteed Orgasm

Need we say more?

Actually we do.

Disclaimer reads: GUARANTEE APPLIES TO MALE PARTNER ONLY. USE AS DIRECTED. NOT FOR USE BY INDIVIDUALS WHO ARE UNDER 18 YEARS OF AGE. Keep out of reach of children. Do not use if you are pregnant or nursing. May cause slight discomfort upon initial use. Continue using until desired effects are achieved or until contents are depleted.

Updated Designs: “Go Ninja!” And “314 In Progress”

We recently made some much needed changes to 2 of our designs.

"Go Ninja!" has been restyled for the 2007 buying season. The text has been replaced with a more Asian-styled font and our Ninja now bursts into the scene wielding two deadly blades to dispatch his enemies with ease. For those of you who prefer the original 2005 design it will still be available in our Retiring Soon section until the end of the year.

314 In Progress" was originally released back in July and we’ve tried out several different renditions in the few short weeks of its existence but have finally settled on this latest redesign. Originally it had a graphic of a naked man running from the text as if it was a squad car, but in print the streaker failed to satisfy our QC team. He has been replaced with the much sexier silhouette of a woman coyly discarding her top, lit only by the red light of the squad car. I think we can all agree that regardless the gender of the wearer, a naked lady is always more appealing than a naked man.

New Design - It's All Deadly!

Whether you prefer bird-doggin' bridesmaids at a random wedding, scopin' out the single moms at soccer games, or settle for being the latest mistake of a local bar-skank: every ladies' man needs an angle. What's yours?

SilverFish Tees releases this latest design with you lusty lotharios in mind. Proudly announce to your targets, your rivals and the world around you that no matter what weapons you decide to pull out of your heavy arsenal, they can be assured that...IT'S ALL DEADLY!

3 NEW DESIGNS!!!

SilverFish Tees is proud to announce three new designs to our ever-growing catalog.

For you martial arts enthusiasts...

If you take pride in your NERDocity...

Or if you likes to get down...

New Design - "314 In Progress"

This one came seemingly from out of nowhere and has probably been the quickest design process from the suggestion of an idea to the end result. A little back story is probably necessary. Now I wasn't there for the first half, but apparently a close friend decided to take a late night swim in the pool of one of our local golf courses and wound up running naked through the parking lot last night.




I was, however there for the second half of its genesis, as the Drat Pack decided to take in Live Free or Die Hard. Anyway, during one of the scenes John McClane trips up a baddie posing as a police dispatcher by calling out the scanner code 587, which we soon learn is cop for Indecent Exposure. Laughs ensue and almost instantly I could hear two buddies mention under their breaths that yet another shirt be made. I don't know if they knew that I heard them but I immediately had the layout in my head and knew that I absolutely wanted the red police light involved.




As soon as we got back to the house I was googling police codes to make sure the reference was accurate. Turns out it wasn't, or who knows it could be a Washington DC thing. However most of the other jurisdictions I could find used 314 almost universally so that's what we went with.




Cherry - check. Naked man - check. Police-y looking font - check. Italicized the font to give it the feeling of a pursuit and slapped the cherry on top of the 314 as if its the cop car. Made the streaker blond and pale(took some artistic liberties with the amount of hair) and we've got our perp. Adjusted the colors to work well on the different shirts and voila...314 In Progress.

314 In Progress

And before anyone states the obvious, I don't want to hear about the sensibility of having a SHIRT that is supposed to imply NUDITY in progress. The wearer could totally run around with the shirt on and his/her bits and pieces flitting about in the fresh midwestern air.

Later
S

SilverFish Reviews - The Janitor - A Novel

Purchase The Janitor Here

SYNOPSIS
The Janitor is the story of Roman Swivel a seemingly meek and mild mannered transfer student joining the ranks of Collingston High School's senior class and working as student janitor. Roman immediately finds himself on the radar of the school's big man on campus and ridiculed by his sheep-like classmates. Appearances can be deceiving, however .For beneath the surface, Roman is a gifted genius with unbelievable talents and a haunted past wrought with violence and tragedy. Hounded by his former mentor and a shadowy government agency, Roman seeks refuge and normalcy in this peaceful Midwestern town, where he'll unexpectedly find friendship, love and belonging. Unfortunately, unbeknownst to our hero, his choice of towns will also set him on a deadly collision course with its seedy underbelly, the demons of his own past, and ultimately his own fate.

REVIEW
Let me preface this by saying that the author, Adam Decker is a personal friend of mine, but that I intend on pulling no punches in this review. That being said, I can honestly say that this book is a solid first effort from a freshman author. Would the major publishing houses buy it? No. Would professional literary critics tear it apart? Definitely. But that's part of the beauty and appeal of the book: that an everyman without the background or connections, and without the support of a publisher or benefit of an editor could manage to crank out a decent work of escapist fiction. The fact that a middle class Joe with a wife and two infant children and at least two jobs that I know of (one of which is extremely time consuming), could find the time over the last five years to piece together a 316 page novel and keep it as seamless and coherent and entertaining as he has is unfathomable to me.

So you'll likely ignore or at least breeze over the few obvious grammatical and typographical errors as myself and most readers have. If it helps, the narrator (the first to befriend Roman) is a "jock" and self-proclaimed poor student so the style could even be considered a plot device rather than mistakes by the author. There is a brief change in voice, but its necessary to reveal Roman's back-story.

All that aside, The Janitor was a quick and almost addictive read. It took me two or three sittings tops. The first was more tedious because I had already read the first six or so chapters online a year or so before he had released the novel in its entirety. But once I got into the fresh material I literally could not put it down. Its like when you buy the complete season of a serialized show and you can't quit and before you know it you've sat through 8 hours of television. In fact, that is how I pictured it in my mind's eye as I read it – as a serialized TV show in the vein of Buffy The Vampire Slayer or more recently Veronica Mars. You've got your high school teen angst drama, then you've got your real world, higher stakes adventure. It's Bourne Identity meets Dawson's Creek, only a much more guy-ed up version of the latter. That's not to diminish the sensitive side of the book. The love scenes themselves are handled with such care the reader is left believing that either the author brought in a ghostwriter or Mrs. Decker wants for nothing in the romance department. The action scenes are described in remarkably vivid detail, and while at times they can delve into the bizarre, they deliver at just the right times throughout the story.

The Janitor is a multi faceted action-adventure peppered with just the right amount of comedy, romance and a slight inkling of science fiction. It's a story of prejudice and acceptance, friendship and love, good and evil, the courage to face that which torments you, and of course – baseball. Even better, its perfectly poised for a sequel, which I am awaiting with baited breath. But alas, the author is currently working on other projects and only plans to revisit Roman Swivel if he sells a certain amount of copies. So help a fledgling author jump start his career, and do myself and other Swivel-heads a solid or just do YOURSELF a favor and buy The Janitor.

Purchase The Janitor Here
or visit
www.adamdecker.com
for more stories, info about the author, or to read
FIRST SIX CHAPTERS FREE!

Already read the book? Help promote the novel and keep yourself clothed. Visit the link below for The Janitor tee-shirts and more.
The Janitor Promotional Merchandise

ReSurfacing: The New Improved SilverFish Tees

In the coming weeks we'll be making some vast improvements (hopefully you'll see them as such) to the look of the store. Streamlining the sections, updating the company logo, and retiring some of the older, more dated designs.

More exciting are the new additions - an on site blog (which you're reading right now), an on site message board, links to The Official Silverfishtees Myspace, and the expansion of our enterprise into custom design.

So please bear with us and excuse the mess....

More to follow,

S